Stop Hitting Yourself

Have you ever had someone take your hand and then forcefully start beating you in the face with it? It’s a very unnatural and unpleasant feeling, not to mention it really hurts. We’re not meant to hurt ourselves with our own limbs and we’re not meant to hurt ourselves with our own words or thoughts. I worked and lived with a woman who made my life miserable. She showed kindness and compassion to everyone she came across, but she loved to pick on me. Any mistake I made I was told how stupid I was. She knew all my [...]

By | 2017-08-06T08:54:18+00:00 August 6th, 2017|0 Comments

The Art of Forgiving.

Ah forgiveness. So fickle and annoying. It's complex and wirey.  It attaches itself to layers of circumstances each one requiring you to work through it. An apology is secondary to forgiveness. True heartfelt, admittance of guilt, behavior changing apologies are rare. They will still require you to work through the offending action(s) and the offender to forgive themselves. So, any real, half-assed, blanket apology or lack thereof is just fluff. Your only task is to work through it and let go.  Forgiveness is an act done for yourself. A grudge is exhausting to hang onto and is good [...]

By | 2017-07-07T12:57:52+00:00 July 7th, 2017|0 Comments

Meeting Carrie Fisher. My True Mother.

We went to the Vancouver Fan Expo in April of 2015 specifically to meet my idol, Carrie Fisher. I was a very lonely, awkward preteen and spent most of my free time lying in bed daydreaming about having adventures in a galaxy far, far away with my mom, Princess Leia. I had rehearsed for over two decades telling her how much she had meant to me during that time and I continued to rehearse in my head for the three hours I stood in line waiting for her to sign my copy of her book Wishful Drinking. She has [...]

By | 2017-08-07T18:55:45+00:00 May 7th, 2017|0 Comments

What It Means To Love Yourself.

I love hearing the ways you all use your Buff Beads.  Some people wear them as a tribute to themselves and their self-worth, almost like a symbol of where their allegiance lies. One woman, who is still grieving the loss of her husband 10 years ago, tells me that she holds them in her hands and tells herself out loud "I am so strong!" She used this technique, as well as self-compassion, to quit smoking.  Another lady who had bought Buff Kids for her pre teen daughter told me that her daughter’s feelings had been hurt by a friend and [...]

By | 2017-07-29T07:33:33+00:00 March 19th, 2015|0 Comments

5 Ways to Feel Good

One of the ideas behind the term “Buff Yourself” is to create in us a data bank filled with ways to make ourselves feel good. On my days when I'm not feeling it, all I want to do is curl up on the couch with a bottle of wine and the Fellowship of the Rings. While there were days where I have done that, it’s not really a progressive way to get to my upswing.  These are a few ways to keep yourself present and give yourself a needed Buff. Show Yourself Compassion. You mean a lot to yourself. There’s [...]

By | 2017-08-09T14:21:52+00:00 August 14th, 2014|0 Comments

The Origin Story

This is how it began: I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis in 1999 when I was 23. I did not take care of it and spent the next 12 years generally feeling annoyed by it. Shortly after my diagnosis in 2000 I was introduced to The Fellowship of the Ring. I had heard of The Lord of The Rings, but I knew very little of it.  I went with no expectation and left with a hole in my soul and wanting to know everything. I saw it six times in theaters and each night I came home and cried. It [...]

By | 2017-06-21T22:17:15+00:00 August 4th, 2014|0 Comments

Give Yourself a Love Buff

Let's talk about Love. Love is my home base. It's where I gain my inspiration from and it's where I go back to when I need answers.  So, what do you love? Not who, but what? Think of things you love enough that when you think of it do you feel that squishy warm love feeling inside? For example; I have a beautiful pair of Louboutin ankle boots hanging on my vision board in front of me right now. Every time I sit and stare at them I get an internal squeal of joy that goes through my body and [...]

By | 2017-08-09T15:43:32+00:00 May 24th, 2014|3 Comments